How do you approach your relationships? Do you approach them as a peer—meaning you view the other person as an equal? Or do you approach them as a pier—meaning you think you need to prop up the other person or carry more than your part of the load? Or do you approach relationships from the perspective that you aren’t capable of carrying your share of the load?
When we approach a relationship from the peer perspective, we send a message to the other person that we value who they are and we view them as an equal. This creates a safe and empowering situation for all. On the other hand, when you think either you have to carry more or think you are incapable to carrying your share, you create an imbalance or a disempowering situation for all.
So why would someone approach a situation from a pier perspective?
When we are young, merely by observing our family dynamics we take on beliefs and behaviors that helps us get our needs met and fit into our family. Some children become caretakers, while others become over-achievers. Others may discover they can get more attention when they are under-achievers or appear helpless, so that is the behavior they take on. Unfortunately in all cases, the child is robbed of the opportunity to discover, fall in love with, and develop their true nature. This can create an inner conflict and imbalance in their system and make it difficult for them to create an authentic life.
So if you think you might be approaching some of your relationships from a pier perspective or needing to be carried by a pier and you would like to change that behavior, I invite you to explore some of the ICWIB art activities and videos for FREE because they are a wonderful way reconnect with your true nature and subsequently create a more authentic life.